As noted in my earlier blog post and under the ‘events’ tab – I’m reading at an event called Writing in the Works (Spring 2013) in Calgary in April. One of the organizers has emailed me and requested my ‘author bio’ – basically the brief biographical sketch the emcee will introduce me to the assembled crowd by.
I’m torn. Basically I have two author bios – one “standard” and then one “I wish”.
“Standard” reads something like this: “Steve Passey lives and writes in Southern Alberta. His first published story Tiger Lily appeared in Existere issue 32.1 in the fall of 2012 and he has another piece appearing in an anthology to be published in the USA shortly. He is currently working on a novel and more short fiction.”
That’s nice hey?
“I wish” reads like this: “Steve Passey crawled out from underneath a pile of sleeping and deeply (emphasize “deeply”) satisfied supermodels long enough to publish the landmark short story Tiger Lily last year and if you walk to his front door and open it and substitute “agents/publishers” for supermodels you’ll know what his walkway looks like. We – indeed the world – await his new fiction with bated breath. His influences range from Chekhov to Maupassant to noted philosophizer (!) Socrates – who – in an alternative time and relative distance in space – claims to have been influenced by Steve. (You can only shag so many supermodels with a dialectic.) His ouvre consists primarily of guns and pussy.”
I’m sending the “standard” to the emcee who – to be fair – probably does not need to be subjected to other.
At any right – I’m gonna rock that reading. Be there.
Now I have to decide what I am going to read.