Just a quick note to note something:
If I post some gag post on astrology (low hanging fruit) or erotica ( stuff found on the ground) I get 10x the views I do when I post links to my stories.
I say 10x to make myself feel good – it’s actually more than that.
Dear Readers: I guess I have to say …. you know how daddy likes it.
When writing erotica, please avoid using the following phrases/euphemisms/terminology by all means necessary:
- Like a screen door in a hurricane
- Baloney Pony
- Banged the shit out of
- Strange burning sensation
- Prayer Group
- Expresso (‘Espresso’ is fine)
- Eight minutes of furious mediocrity
- Squish Biscuit
- For King and Country!
- The smell of fear
- Republican Primary
- Drum Circle
- Anything that rhymes with “Rumpelstiltskin”
- Pork ninja
- Fat as fuck
Seriously – don’t write these or it’ll kill your shit. Your story becomes very put down-able.
If you can think of any others post ’em up in the comments.
Rock on compadres, I shall return to throw some horns and rock out in the very near future, after I finish rocking out and throwing some horns,
My short story “one inch of Air” is live @ Tracer Publishing today.
You can read it Here
I’ve always wondered if hypothermia set in faster than drowning. I believe it does, but read the story and let me know what you think.
Much thanks to Alex Brown of Tracer for accepting the piece and putting it up.